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Finding Your Authentic Self!

As I sit here trying to figure out what to say about this, I am reminded that each individual has a different path, a different past, a different future. That said, we need to realize that living as your authentic self sounds easy. But sometimes it just isn’t. Society expects you to look and act a certain way. Your friends expect you to look and act a certain way. Even your ego and self-worth expect you to act a certain way. We as people are raised with expectations that can not always be met. Maybe the child that we were does not reflect the person that we become. All of these things and more can affect how you view and become your authentic self. My journey to become my authentic self, took time, tears, soul searching, meditation and letting go of things that no longer served me. As many of you know I worked in a law firm for many years. Was I being my authentic self when I worked there? Maybe, in part. During that time, I was taking yoga teacher training and Reiki classes. So that is part of my authentic self, but working in a law firm was exciting some times, but not always. I never felt that this is what I should be doing for myself. I made really good money. Had a house and 2 cars. I traveled some, I thought I was pretty happy and being who I authentically was. But I wasn’t. I left my job at their request and it was one of the best days of my life. I was free. Or was I?

Next, I became a Doula. I loved this. It fed my soul. Birth work still does. But when I saw what doctors and nurses did to pregnant women during labor and delivery, I burned out pretty quickly. I still want to help pregnant women, but the timing is not right for this yet. It will be. This is part of my authentic self.

What are your passions? What do you love to do? Maybe its teaching others. Maybe it’s following your spiritual path, maybe it’s something else. Or maybe you are in the process of finding what your passion is. It’s all good. This is not an exercise in stress to find your authentic self, this is just a way you may be able to find it.

So, what can you do to become your authentic self? Well one thing you can do is visualize yourself as your authentic self. Take a few minutes every day, close your eyes and imagine how life could be if you were your authentic self. Maybe it takes a few times. Maybe you know what your dream job or career is. Whatever it is, see it in your minds eye. Write down a description of what you see. Maybe even draw a picture. Then figure out one or two things that you could do on your path to become your authentic self. Maybe it’s as easy as just making a decision to be who you are? That sounds like a dream to me. Most of the time, anyway for me. It takes work. Work on yourself. The kind of work that brings emotions and feelings up that you didn’t know you had. It’s looking at yourself and picking things apart that you thought worked for you, especially if your vision of yourself and the self you are now don’t line up. Yes, it can be a shit show.

So, let’s see what you can do for yourself to help put what you visualize and what you are now come together.

The first thing that comes to mind is meditation. Sit still and visualize your authentic self, what your doing, how your doing, how do you feel about it. You may see that things come up that you didn’t expect. Write what you see and feel in a journal. It doesn’t have to be a fancy journal. Go to the dollar store and get some of the paper booklets for a dollar. The important thing is you have a place to write about this and its yours.

The second thing that I am thinking of is nature. I go to the desert once a week to get some peace and to meditate. It helps me to get rid of some of my stress and worries. I also like to talk to trees. They listen without any comments about what you’re doing. They just listen. And sometimes that’s really what you need. No advice. No one trying to tell you what to do. Just someone or something to listen. Trees are good at that.

The third thing is to trust yourself that your path is yours and no matter what society, or tv, or anyone else thinks, your being your authentic self. If someone doesn’t like who you have become, don’t let what they say become your truth. Because its not.

Speaking of truth, being your authentic self means speaking your truth and trusting yourself that what you have to say is important. Obviously speaking your truth can mean many things and sometimes it means that your truth doesn’t always resonate with other people’s truth, and that’s ok. I had issues for years about this part of the puzzle. I’m better now. But for me it took a long time. Speaking your truth is also trusting yourself and the person you’re speaking to. It’s a crazy dance of words and emotions.

The other thing is for you to accept and love the new and improved you. This may be one of the harder things to do. Why? Because looking in the mirror and accepting and loving the new you are easy compared to going out into the world where people can criticize the new you. It seems to come from family first and trickles to co-workers and others. Because people that you know will notice the change and question you about why you did that because you were perfectly fine the way you were! Outside opinions don’t matter, but our ego says they do. They shouldn’t but they do. It can be a slippery slope. Stay strong in your conviction. You will be glad you did. Baby steps.

I’ve come a long way on my path but I’m not done yet. I still have things on my list that I would love to do as my authentic self. Travel to Tibet, India, the Rain Forest. Write a book (its started but has a way to go). Teach people how to heal themselves with healing energy and the food they eat, and that’s only a few things. This is also a part of being your authentic self. Make yourself a list of what you want to do as your authentic self. Put your list up somewhere so you can see it. Use it during your visualizations. You can do this. Have faith in yourself. I do!

If you need help, let me know. I’m here for you. If you would like more information about what I do or how I managed to get to a point in my life that I feel like my authentic self. I’m still not 100% better, but I’m closer than I have ever been, lets chat. Text is best. I know it’s not rocket science or major surgery, but it sure feels like that sometimes. Hang in there and give yourself love and acceptance. You can do this. I have faith in you.

Thank you.

Karen Reimer

(925) 895-4948

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